So.. this post is kind of like a therapy post. I don't know that there is any real entertainment value to it, but I feel like I need to write it for me! :) I've always felt the best therapy comes from writing down whats inside!!
First off, I wanted to share a sweet video! This is a video of my beautiful niece Jordan Kalysta. She is my oldest brother's daughter. He passed away when he was only 18! Jordy is used to being the only grandbaby in the family!! And my has she LOVED the attention she gets from that title!! :) We LOVE having her in our life! She is such a light to us and has helped to heal our hearts when we thought they could not feel whole again!
Anyway, on Thanksgiving, I thought I'd tell Jordy a piece of news that she might find especially important. She wasn't going to be the only grandbaby anymore!! Nana Kitty and Papa were going to have another little baby in the family. Josh and I were pregnant!
THIS was her reaction.. (I LOVE this video! You will have to copy/paste into your browser!)
We were all so excited!! I couldn't believe that I was actually going to be a mom! I couldn't wait! I had a lot of emotions come over me when we found out the news! Among all of the emotions I felt, the greatest was excitement! A couple months went by and Josh and I kept getting more imbedded in the mindset that we were going to be parents. The baby was supposed to be due on August 15th, 2012! Oh the plans I had!! :)
At the end of January, things took a turn for the worst and we ended up loosing our little one at almost 11 weeks. Just 2 weeks short of the 2nd trimester! We were devastated... but after a few days of crying, resting and eating chocolate I was back into the real world. I became hopeful again very soon! MUCH thanks to the help of my sweetheart, who is ALWAYS so positive about everything!!
We waited for a month or so and fell pregnant again not too long after my first loss. I was only 5 weeks and 2 days, when again... another huge blow! We had lost yet another pregnancy!!
After all thats happened, I just feel gratitude! I have realized what a MIRACLE it is, every time a healthy child is born! How much we are at the mercy of God for everything in our lives. Our bodies and our flesh is truly in his hands! We breathe, because he grants us breath! I know that the Lord knows the answers. Sometimes in life, we simply do not. No matter how hard we TRY to make sense of things... we can't! There are just situations like that in life that do not make sense. I believe this is when God wants us to lean on him in faith even more. Believe in him even more. Take the ACTION to accept and press forward regardless of what's going on around you! I know that Jesus Christ died for me on the cross. That his merciful hand extends to all those in pain and agony. I know that he feels all of the pain i've felt, and can comfort me in my darkest hours!
I believe that my little spirits will still come to me.. and that God is just waiting for the perfect body to send them in! :) I have to have faith! It's ALL we can have!!
Precious Little One
I`m just a precious little one
who didn`t make it there.
I went straight to be with Jesus,
but I`m waiting for you here.
Many dwelling here where I live,
waited years to enter in.
Struggled through a world of sorow,
a world marred with pain and sin.
Thank you for the life you gave me,
it was brief but don`t complain.
I have all Heaven`s Glory,
suffered none of earth`s great pain.
Thank you for the name you gave me.
I`d have loved to bring it fame.
But if I`d lingered in earth`s shadows,
I would have suffered just the same.
So sweet family-don`t you sorrow.
Wipe those tears and chase the gloom.
I went straight to Jesus` arms
from my loving Mother`s womb.
~Author Unknown
~ You Make Me Sing... You're Every Line, You're Every Word, You're Everything ~
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Easter Surprise
This Easter was wonderful! It was our first together being married, and Josh being his wonderful self, organized a sweet surprise for me. That is one of the best things about being married. We get to spoil each other, and do little surprises for one another, and serve each other. Josh is so good at always making me feel so loved, he is constantly leaving little love notes around the house, or surprising me with random things... I am so lucky to be married to him!!!
For example, these pants:
(I had wanted the pink ones really bad! The other ones were just because! Josh picks out the best clothes for me! He has very good taste!) :)
On my birthday, I woke up to a candle lit breakfast, a decorated house AND a decorated car! :)
I couldn't go in there for some reason... he always lets me know i'm a princess! :)
Josh makes me breakfast almost every Saturday morning! I told him I don't expect it but he knows how much I love it!! He is so sweet!! This is one of our favorites!! Compliments to his momma, Shauna Gruwell who is an A-M-A-Z-I-N-G cook!! These are called german pancakes. It's our FAVORITE breakfast ever, and Josh makes them a lot for us!
There are too many awesome memories I could share about our first 8 months of being married, but I'm trying to play catch up! So.. I'll just stick to the best ones!
SO... back to my Easter Surprise! The video pretty much says it all, but Josh surprised me with an Easter Egg hunt at our house!! He is so thoughtful! I just am amazed all the time!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?gl=US&hl=en&client=mv-google&v=6JiO--BtYLY&nomobile=1
The next day, the Easter Bunny called ;) He hid Josh's Easter basket in our house!! When Josh got home from work, I told him about the phone call from a special bunny that i'd received. Being the competitive man that my husband is.. he found the Easter basket quicker than it took me to hide it.. I mean, the Easter Bunny to hide it! :)
For example, these pants:
(I had wanted the pink ones really bad! The other ones were just because! Josh picks out the best clothes for me! He has very good taste!) :)
On my birthday, I woke up to a candle lit breakfast, a decorated house AND a decorated car! :)
I couldn't go in there for some reason... he always lets me know i'm a princess! :)
Josh makes me breakfast almost every Saturday morning! I told him I don't expect it but he knows how much I love it!! He is so sweet!! This is one of our favorites!! Compliments to his momma, Shauna Gruwell who is an A-M-A-Z-I-N-G cook!! These are called german pancakes. It's our FAVORITE breakfast ever, and Josh makes them a lot for us!
There are too many awesome memories I could share about our first 8 months of being married, but I'm trying to play catch up! So.. I'll just stick to the best ones!
SO... back to my Easter Surprise! The video pretty much says it all, but Josh surprised me with an Easter Egg hunt at our house!! He is so thoughtful! I just am amazed all the time!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?gl=US&hl=en&client=mv-google&v=6JiO--BtYLY&nomobile=1
The next day, the Easter Bunny called ;) He hid Josh's Easter basket in our house!! When Josh got home from work, I told him about the phone call from a special bunny that i'd received. Being the competitive man that my husband is.. he found the Easter basket quicker than it took me to hide it.. I mean, the Easter Bunny to hide it! :)
It is 1:34 am and I have finally finished putting this blog together. Josh is working on building a website for a school assignment this very moment. Luckily, it's spring break for me and Josh doesn't have class tomorrow so we are OK to stay awake later than usual! :)
For my very first blog post, I thought I'd go back to the beginning, where it all started! I want to briefly tell the story of how Josh and I met! :) The beginning of our love story as Josh likes to call it!
On March 22nd, 2011 I met Josh for the first time. My best friend Emily and I had decided to go the gym that evening. I lived in Payson with my parents at the time, and Em lived in Elk Ridge with hers. We were going to go to the Spanish Fork gym, but for some reason I had an odd desire to go to the Provo gym. Even though the Provo gym is much further and it's more gas money and time, I felt like we should go there. It wasn't some huge prompting or anything... rather a small thought. The thought popped into my, and I thought "Why Not?" I was the one driving and so Emily didn't mind if we went to Provo instead. So off we went!
When we got there, I went for a long run. I needed to clear my mind from many things. Emily started doing weights and we kind of went our separate ways. After my run, I decided to go find Em. I found her doing abs. ;) There weren't any free machines near by so I decided to just wait until she was done. While I was waiting and fussing with my little ipod, I noticed a guy walk past me wearing a golds gym shirt. He walked into the office right by where Em and I were. A few minutes later, I guess he stepped out of the office but I didn't notice. I didn't notice until I heard him say "Do you like your ipod?" We then talked for a little over a minute. Josh was very friendly and just asked me about myself. After we were done talking, he told me to have a nice evening!
HMMMM!!! I didn't know what to think of that? Was he hitting on me? Or... was he just being friendly? He was probably just being polite, he did work there after all! When Emily and I were leaving the gym, I said to her "He was a nice guy! He just seemed like a really good guy!" Then Emily said "You should leave your number for him!" I thought.. NO WAY! I don't leave my number for guys. I never have before. :) Plus, I didn't think he was interested in me anyway... and I really, really didn't want to date anyone. I was so done with dating! (Isn't that what always happens? The guy or girl just about GIVES UP on dating/love, and then BAM.. they meet that person who changes everything)!
Emily sarcastically repeated back to me.. "Do you like your ipod?" ;)
OKAY, so I kind of took it on as a dare! I was apprehensive to want to date anyone or put myself out there ever again... but I thought, okay, I can do this. I figured if he didn't call, it didn't matter anyway... and if he did call and I didn't like him.. well it's always okay to just get to know new people... plus, it's free dinner! :)
So.. I left my number at the front desk. I didn't think he'd call. I didn't really think much of it at all. After that, I went home and went to bed.
I didn't think much of it at all that is, until the next day when I get a voicemail from a guy named Josh, saying he'd like to go out! ha ha! I honestly didn't know what to do! I hadn't really wanted to go out, because I didn't feel like I was ready to like someone.. and deep down, I had a hunch that this guy might be the kind of person I'd like.
So, the story has it that I was busy for while. I didn't call him back for a few days... but sent a courtesy text because I felt like I was being mean. All the while I was fighting myself. ;) I didn't want to date, but I knew I needed to get out there... and I knew that Josh was different. My small 2 minute interaction with him at the gym made me feel that way. He was just... different. That's all!
So, two weeks after that first phone call, we finally set up our first date. It was a simple first date. It was also the most refreshing date i'd ever been on. There didn't seem to be anything romantic between us, because we didn't flirt... we mostly just talked like friends. We met up around 9:15 at Yozone Frozen Yogurt, and talked past midnight. I had to get up at 5:00 am for work the next day. I was so tired! Little did I know, that was just the beginning of many sleepless nights I would have! But it was all worth it!
The next four weeks FLEW BY!! Since our first date at Yozone, we were together every single day. With each passing day, I started to fall more and more in love. Every second I was with him I felt reassured that he was the guy for me! It was just this overwhelming feeling of peace that I had... I didn't know I could feel this way about someone so fast. The amazing thing was.. I wasn't scared, afraid or hesitant at all. This was all new to me.
So, there I was... walking in my parents footsteps. I used to always tease my parents about how quick their engagement was! I told my mom I would NEVER do that. I could NEVER meet someone and get engaged to them 4 weeks later. I guess the phrase "Never say Never" rings true for me!
We got engaged on April 25th and it was the happiest day of my life up to that point!! :) He asked me to marry him at The Roof Restaurant. The Salt Lake Temple was in our view and our song was playing..... "Everything" by Michael Buble
For my very first blog post, I thought I'd go back to the beginning, where it all started! I want to briefly tell the story of how Josh and I met! :) The beginning of our love story as Josh likes to call it!
On March 22nd, 2011 I met Josh for the first time. My best friend Emily and I had decided to go the gym that evening. I lived in Payson with my parents at the time, and Em lived in Elk Ridge with hers. We were going to go to the Spanish Fork gym, but for some reason I had an odd desire to go to the Provo gym. Even though the Provo gym is much further and it's more gas money and time, I felt like we should go there. It wasn't some huge prompting or anything... rather a small thought. The thought popped into my, and I thought "Why Not?" I was the one driving and so Emily didn't mind if we went to Provo instead. So off we went!
When we got there, I went for a long run. I needed to clear my mind from many things. Emily started doing weights and we kind of went our separate ways. After my run, I decided to go find Em. I found her doing abs. ;) There weren't any free machines near by so I decided to just wait until she was done. While I was waiting and fussing with my little ipod, I noticed a guy walk past me wearing a golds gym shirt. He walked into the office right by where Em and I were. A few minutes later, I guess he stepped out of the office but I didn't notice. I didn't notice until I heard him say "Do you like your ipod?" We then talked for a little over a minute. Josh was very friendly and just asked me about myself. After we were done talking, he told me to have a nice evening!
HMMMM!!! I didn't know what to think of that? Was he hitting on me? Or... was he just being friendly? He was probably just being polite, he did work there after all! When Emily and I were leaving the gym, I said to her "He was a nice guy! He just seemed like a really good guy!" Then Emily said "You should leave your number for him!" I thought.. NO WAY! I don't leave my number for guys. I never have before. :) Plus, I didn't think he was interested in me anyway... and I really, really didn't want to date anyone. I was so done with dating! (Isn't that what always happens? The guy or girl just about GIVES UP on dating/love, and then BAM.. they meet that person who changes everything)!
Emily sarcastically repeated back to me.. "Do you like your ipod?" ;)
OKAY, so I kind of took it on as a dare! I was apprehensive to want to date anyone or put myself out there ever again... but I thought, okay, I can do this. I figured if he didn't call, it didn't matter anyway... and if he did call and I didn't like him.. well it's always okay to just get to know new people... plus, it's free dinner! :)
So.. I left my number at the front desk. I didn't think he'd call. I didn't really think much of it at all. After that, I went home and went to bed.
I didn't think much of it at all that is, until the next day when I get a voicemail from a guy named Josh, saying he'd like to go out! ha ha! I honestly didn't know what to do! I hadn't really wanted to go out, because I didn't feel like I was ready to like someone.. and deep down, I had a hunch that this guy might be the kind of person I'd like.
So, the story has it that I was busy for while. I didn't call him back for a few days... but sent a courtesy text because I felt like I was being mean. All the while I was fighting myself. ;) I didn't want to date, but I knew I needed to get out there... and I knew that Josh was different. My small 2 minute interaction with him at the gym made me feel that way. He was just... different. That's all!
So, two weeks after that first phone call, we finally set up our first date. It was a simple first date. It was also the most refreshing date i'd ever been on. There didn't seem to be anything romantic between us, because we didn't flirt... we mostly just talked like friends. We met up around 9:15 at Yozone Frozen Yogurt, and talked past midnight. I had to get up at 5:00 am for work the next day. I was so tired! Little did I know, that was just the beginning of many sleepless nights I would have! But it was all worth it!
The next four weeks FLEW BY!! Since our first date at Yozone, we were together every single day. With each passing day, I started to fall more and more in love. Every second I was with him I felt reassured that he was the guy for me! It was just this overwhelming feeling of peace that I had... I didn't know I could feel this way about someone so fast. The amazing thing was.. I wasn't scared, afraid or hesitant at all. This was all new to me.
So, there I was... walking in my parents footsteps. I used to always tease my parents about how quick their engagement was! I told my mom I would NEVER do that. I could NEVER meet someone and get engaged to them 4 weeks later. I guess the phrase "Never say Never" rings true for me!
We got engaged on April 25th and it was the happiest day of my life up to that point!! :) He asked me to marry him at The Roof Restaurant. The Salt Lake Temple was in our view and our song was playing..... "Everything" by Michael Buble
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